The reason why I say that what they did was wrong is because they judged her on the basis of a framework that she herself didn't even under stand at that time. If I would have been in the same position I would have let her stay, because I understood what her problems were.
Like I said, I do not consider the people involved as bad people, they just didn't know how to deal with her and she didn't know how to deal with them. If I would have had the possibility I would have offered her a place. I did so once when I could and she refused because she wanted to go her own way (so much for her desire to get men to support her).
Yeah, she was difficult, and she was struggling with her identity as an African woman from a muslim country all of a sudden being thrust into this super edgy white, atheist European scene, but she forged her own path until I lost contact with her. The last time I saw her she was working in a restaurant close to my home and was very happy that for the first time in her life she was entirely making it on her own. She may have gone to the other extreme at some point and refused help because she wanted to prove that she can make it on her own. I know very well what that feels like as a guy who struggled for half his life to be self-sufficient.
As for the LGBT angle you bring in, there is a major issue when it comes to people who are simply not used to that kind of stuff from where they come from. In fact I had a really long conversation with "Karima" where we talked about all of that and I tried explaining to her how fluid gender indentity works in this strange identity melting pot we live in. In the end she understood and accepted it, and that made her a great person in my eyes. The fact that she could transcend the cultural norms that had been hammered into her by a society she left behind. Something that is the sign of a human being who has matured and become conscious; able to form her own view of the world and the people around her despite all the "culture shock"
This would have been a valuable observation to make in this book, but instead the U.S. American woman-of-colour uses an African as a vehicle to express her cheap and stereotypical view of a "lost child" while smugly judging her as unfit for the European scene she found herself in.
Judgement
The reason why I say that what they did was wrong is because they judged her on the basis of a framework that she herself didn't even under stand at that time. If I would have been in the same position I would have let her stay, because I understood what her problems were.
Like I said, I do not consider the people involved as bad people, they just didn't know how to deal with her and she didn't know how to deal with them. If I would have had the possibility I would have offered her a place. I did so once when I could and she refused because she wanted to go her own way (so much for her desire to get men to support her).
Yeah, she was difficult, and she was struggling with her identity as an African woman from a muslim country all of a sudden being thrust into this super edgy white, atheist European scene, but she forged her own path until I lost contact with her. The last time I saw her she was working in a restaurant close to my home and was very happy that for the first time in her life she was entirely making it on her own. She may have gone to the other extreme at some point and refused help because she wanted to prove that she can make it on her own. I know very well what that feels like as a guy who struggled for half his life to be self-sufficient.
As for the LGBT angle you bring in, there is a major issue when it comes to people who are simply not used to that kind of stuff from where they come from. In fact I had a really long conversation with "Karima" where we talked about all of that and I tried explaining to her how fluid gender indentity works in this strange identity melting pot we live in. In the end she understood and accepted it, and that made her a great person in my eyes. The fact that she could transcend the cultural norms that had been hammered into her by a society she left behind. Something that is the sign of a human being who has matured and become conscious; able to form her own view of the world and the people around her despite all the "culture shock"
This would have been a valuable observation to make in this book, but instead the U.S. American woman-of-colour uses an African as a vehicle to express her cheap and stereotypical view of a "lost child" while smugly judging her as unfit for the European scene she found herself in.
I find that shameful .